New
Arrivals
Author-Suzie
Titles
More Than a Thesis
by Suzie
Summary: Blair wants to stay put. #2 in Writer's Block Series #1.
Disclaimer: Some of the characters in this story belong to the UPN Network and Pet Fly Productions as part of the television show The Sentinel. I do not claim these characters as my own. No money has changed hands.
"Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood."
-- Helen Keller
"Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present."
-- Albert Camus
######
Twenty hours after getting home from the hospital, Blair shuffled blearily out of his room. He couldn't believe he'd slept so long, and cursed the doctors and drugs for his intense need to get to the bathroom to relieve himself despite the aching in his body.
"Jim?" Blair whispered carefully as he left the bathroom to head for the kitchen.
"Hey, Blair," a cheerful voice said from the kitchen. "How ya feelin'?"
Blair smiled, "Hey, Kelsey." He went around to meet her with a warm hug and planted a kiss on her temple. "I'm okay." His voice was hoarse and painful.
Kelsey pushed him back gently to arms length and eyed him up and down. "You don't really look or sound okay, but Jim says you'll live."
Blair was still pale, his eyes a little cloudy and red. Kelsey could tell by the way he was breathing that his chest still ached.
Tears suddenly welled in Kelsey's eyes as she looked up at him and said, "When he called yesterday and told me what happened ... I got so scared! Jim was so worried and ... angry ... and ... I ..."
Blair gathered the small woman into his arms again and stroked the back of her head soothingly. "Shh, it's alright. I'm okay ... really."
"I'm sorry. Didn't mean to lose it on you. I'm just glad you're alright," Kelsey sniffled into Blair bare shoulder. She pushed away enough to look at him and smiled, "Hungry?"
Blair smiled back into Kelsey's green eyes, brushing a few lose strands of hair from her face. "Starved. What are you doing here anyway? Where's Jim?"
"Jim had to go into the station. Captain Banks needed information for some reports. Something about 'roughing up' the suspect. Jim didn't want you to be here alone, so I took the day off from work and he picked me up this morning." Kelsey shrugged and turned toward the kitchen. "Go get something on while I heat some soup."
Blair blinked and looked down at himself. A pair of boxers was all he had on. He blushed, realizing he hadn't *realized* his state of undress. Retreating back to his room, Blair returned with his robe on.
As Blair sat down at the table, Kelsey set a glass of apple juice and two bottles of medication in front of him. "Jim told me to make sure you take those."
Leave it to Jim to find me a babysitter, Blair thought as he smiled and mouthed a "thank you." Then shook a pill from each bottle and choked them down with the juice. Swallowing was *so* not fun at the present.
A few minutes later, Kelsey set a warm bowl of chicken noodle soup on the table and slid into the chair opposite Blair. She watched him eat for several minutes before asking, "I know you probably don't feel like talking right now, but ..."
Blair looked at her. "What?"
"Do you remember what happened?"
Putting the spoon down, Blair thought for a moment before answering, "No. I remember Delta grabbing me during the stake out ... while Jim was out of the truck. But ... nothing else 'til I woke up in the hospital. I only know what Jim told me before we came home ... and I don't think I remember all of that. Why?"
Kelsey shrugged and watched her fingers as they drew lazy circles on the tabletop.
"Hey, what's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Kelsey?" Blair tried to sound stern, but his voice cracked harshly.
Fingers pausing for a moment, still not meeting Blair's eyes. Kelsey said, "When Jim called yesterday he told me what happened. How he found you ... the gas and all." Her fingers resumed their random circles. "He said you could have died ... and the lab still isn't completely sure what was in that canister."
Blair sighed, "Jim shouldn't have scared you. He worries too much."
Kelsey's hand slapped the top of the table with a stinging force that made the young man jump. She looked up with angry tears. "No he doesn't, Blair Sandburg! Don't *ever* say that!"
Blair's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Whoa there! I didn't mean ..."
"Jim loves you like a brother ... don't you see that? He doesn't worry *too* much ... he just cares a *whole* lot." Kelsey's eyes pleaded for understanding. "I know I've only been around you guys for about six months now, but I can see it. You guide each other. You're a part of each other's lives that neither of you has known before. You need each other."
Blair moved to sit beside Kelsey and held her. He could feel her shaking and said, "Where is this coming from?" Blair asked quietly. How could you know?
Kelsey sighed, "Before we all met ... and I learned what having a *family* could really be like.” She swiped her sleeve over her eyes and face. “Well, it's just that ... when you don't have something ... you tend to see that something in others."
Blair caught her chin and brought it up to meet his eyes before saying, "Hey, if Jim and I are like brothers ... than you're our sister. We love you, Kelsey."
Kelsey's arms snaked around Blair's middle. "I don't remember hearing those words before I met you guys ... thank you. I love you, too. Both of you."
A pinch of sadness made Blair tighten his embrace on the smaller body again. "I'll make sure you hear it more often from now on ... from both of us," he whispered hoarsely. "I know Jim cares about me, but ... sometimes ... I just wish he'd let me grow up, ya know?"
Kelsey nodded her understanding against his chest.
"Like today, man. I could've stayed home alone. Not that I mind having you here to keep me company. But, sometimes he gets way too protective ... treats me like a kid instead of an adult. Most of the times I just sort of ignore it, but other times it really bothers me. 'Specially when I'm suppose to be his backup."
Kelsey pushed back and looked up at Blair with incredulous little grin.
"I know ... I know. Blessed Protector, big brother, mother hen. It's Jim ... It's the way he is."
"You're the same way."
"What?! No way!"
"Yes way!" Kelsey said with a giggle. "I've seen you. You get all hovering like ... wanting to fix him teas and stuff. Your styles are a little different, but you both do the same thing. You guys do it to me all the time." I don't mind at all.
"Yeah, but that's different."
"Oh, really?"
"Yeah. Jim and I *agree* about the way we treat you. When you had the flu last month ... didn't we hover over you equally?"
Kelsey giggled again, "Yeah, I guess so. Want me to reheat your soup?"
"Nah ... takes too much effort to swallow. I'll have more later."
"Okay," Kelsey said as she stood and took the dishes out to the kitchen, depositing them in the sink. Turning to lean on the counter, she said, "You should talk to Jim."
"What?" Blair asked as he stood and scooted the chairs under the table.
"Tell Jim how you feel. Let him know he gets a little overprotective at times."
Blair shrugged, "I've thought about saying something more than once, but he's so sincere ... I don't want to hurt his feelings. And a lot of times it's not so bad."
"I think if you two were to sit down and discuss it openly he'd understand."
"Yeah ... maybe. I'm ... umm ... gonna get a shower."
Kelsey nodded and watched the young man head towards his room to gather clothes.
**********
The phone rang as the water in the shower went on.
"Hello?" Kelsey said into the receiver.
"Hi, it's Jim."
"Hi! What's up?" Kelsey sat down on the sofa with a sigh.
"Just thought I'd check in. How's Blair?"
"He's doing fine. Takin' a shower right now."
"Did he take his pills?" Jim asked.
"Uh huh."
"Any coughing fits?"
"Nope."
"Has he eaten?"
"Yep."
"Is he talking too much?"
"Of course." My fault though, Kelsey said to herself.
Amusement was evident in Jim's voice as he said, "No problems then?"
"Not a one. What time are you going to be home?" Kelsey asked as she kicked off her shoes and pulled her feet up under her.
"I'll be leaving here around 4:00 ... maybe 4:30. Why?"
"My turn to fix dinner."
"Oh yeah! I won't be late."
"Great! We'll see ya later then."
"Bye."
**********
Blair stood under the stream of hot water. She's right, you know, he told himself. You should discuss this with Jim. Someday you're liable to say something you don't really mean and regret it. Blair shampooed his hair. Jim does care ... a lot. I can't fault him on that. I don't want to hurt his feelings, but sometimes he's just ... He shrugged absently as the suds rinsed out of his long curly hair. I don't know ... too much? Blair lathered up a washcloth and started pushing it over his body. Yeah, we really need to talk. Soon ... but when it doesn't hurt so much. Rinsing off the soap and turning the water off, Blair reached for a towel as he stepped out onto the rug. Gotta do this right though. Oh man ... I *so* don't want to ruin what we've got. Finished drying himself, he wrapped the towel around his waist and looked at himself in the slowly clearing mirror. I don't feel like shaving. Blair picked up his toothbrush and toothpaste. I don't even know when Jim stopped being my thesis and became my friend? He smiled around the toothbrush as he scrubbed. It happened so damn fast. He spit the toothpaste out and rinsed his mouth, then began to pull on a clean pair of sweats. He is, like, soo ... complicated!
**********
Jim arrived home at 5pm. He could smell dinner as he exited the truck in the parking lot and smiled. "Kelsey's homemade chicken pot pies," Jim whispered to himself as he inhaled deeply. Then chuckled with child like glee, "And a beef one just for me."
Upon entering the loft, Jim saw two of the people he cared most about on the sofa. Kelsey lying back against two bed pillows with Blair laying between her legs, using her stomach as a pillow. Both were sound asleep. The end credits of "Darkwing Duck" were rolling on the TV screen.
Jim grinned happily as he hung his coat on its customary hook near the door. He checked the oven and saw there were thirty-minutes left on the timer. Walking quietly around to the two sleeping people, Jim kissed Kelsey lightly on the forehead. “Rise and shine,” he whispered.
With a sigh, sleepy eyes opened and Kelsey looked up at Jim with a smile. "Hey, detective," she whispered. "Gotta search warrant?"
It had become a standard greeting from the young woman.
"I got a report of a couple of vagrants hangin' out here," Jim smiled quietly. "Thought I should do a little of that serve and protect stuff."
Kelsey giggled as she placed a hand on Blair's head and tousled his hair gently. "Blair, wake up. We've been busted."
"Huh? Wha'?" Blair mumbled groggily and opened his eyes. "Oh ... hey, big guy," he said in his raspy whisper.
Jim shook his head; amused as he watched them sit up. "Been out long?"
Kelsey squinted at the clock on the VCR, then said, "About an hour I guess." She stood and headed for the kitchen. "Guess I better finish making dinner."
"Smells great!" Jim mentioned. Then turned his attention back to Blair. "Hey, Chief. How you feeling?"
"Not too bad, considering I can't talk or swallow very well, and all I've done is sleep," Blair replied with a smirk.
"No more coughing? Headaches?"
Blair shook his head. "Slight headache ... off and on, but I feel better."
Jim nodded, satisfied. "How's your chest?"
Taking a fairly deep breath before wincing slightly, Blair said, "Better ... just sore ... kinda like pulled muscles."
"Yeah, you pulled the muscles in your chest when you were trying so hard to suck in air."
Kelsey returned to the living room and handed Jim a beer.
"You staying the night?" Jim asked before twisting the cap off the bottle. "I'm not gonna drink this if I have to take you home later."
"I'll take the bus home," Kelsey replied.
"No you won't." Jim removed the cap and took a swig of the cold, amber liquid. "You spend the night. I'll take you home tomorrow."
"I didn't bring any clothes."
"You've got more clothes in my closet than I do," Blair grinned.
"Only because you don't hang your clothes up, Chief," Jim teased.
Blair glared at the big man good-naturedly.
"Okay, I'll stay,” Kelsey finally agreed. “But I get the sofa."
Jim and Blair both began to protest.
"Hey ... I'm the guest, so I get to choose where I sleep." Then Kelsey retreated toward the kitchen.
Jim threw the bottle cap at her, bouncing it off the back of her head. "You'll never be a guest here, Kelsey. You're family."
"Thank you ... I still get the sofa."
**********
"Dinner was great, Kelsey. Thanks," Jim said as he finished the dishes and joined her in the living room.
"Yeah, thanks," Blair said, hoarsely, from the kitchen where he was getting sodas for him and Kelsey and another beer for Jim.
"Thank you. There's two chicken and two beef pot pies in the freezer for whenever you want them."
"So that's what was in your backpack this morning when I picked you up."
"Uh huh," Kelsey smiled as she continued to look through the cable guide for a movie. "How 'bout 'Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery' on pay-per-view?"
"No!" Jim and Blair said simultaneously.
"Okay," Kelsey sighed and turned the page. "Oh! Oh ... 'George of the Jungle'!"
"That sounds good," Blair said.
"Pleasepleaseplease!" Kelsey begged.
Jim looked at the two and rolled his eyes.
“It’s suppose to be really good! Please, Jim? I’ll pay for it.”
“Kelsey, it’s only $2.95. I think I can spring for it,” Jim said, knowing full well he would lose if he argued.
“Cool! Thanks, Jim!”
Blair laughed at the feigned look of disgust on his friend’s face.
**********
“You have to admit it, Jim,” Blair grinned as he stretched. “It wasn’t such a bad movie, was it?”
Jim shrugged, “It was okay.”
“Jim, you were laughing hardest of all of us!”
Smiling, Jim remained noncommittal.
“Well, I thought it was great,” Kelsey announced as she stood and began gathering the empty soda cans and beer bottles off the coffee table to take to the kitchen.
Blair stood and wobbled a bit as a slight dizziness passed. “Whoa … head rush.”
Jim quickly stood and grabbed Blair by the arms. “Steady there, Chief. You okay?”
“Yeah, just stood up too fast.” Blair sighed and smiled up at his friend. “I think I’ll go on to bed.”
“You look beat. See you in the morning … sleep well, buddy.”
“No problem there, man.”
Kelsey met Blair as he walked toward his room. She handed him a glass of water and his meds, “Night, Blair. Holler if ya need anything tonight.”
Blair downed the pills and handed the glass back to Kelsey. “Thanks.” He leaned forward and gave her a little peck on the cheek. “G’night.”
Kelsey turned back to the kitchen to straighten things up a little as Blair disappeared into the bathroom.
Jim watched from the living room. He listened to the younger man’s movements absently, more out of habit than anything else, until Blair closed the doors to his bedroom. Alternating his gaze between the bedroom and the kitchen, Jim waited until Blair’s room went dark. “Kelsey,” he whispered. “Can we talk?”
Kelsey tossed the sponge back into the sink and walked back to the living room. “Sure, Jim. What’s up?”
Jim took her by the hand as she stepped around the sofa and brought her to sit next to him. “Kelsey, you were with Blair all day. Did he … say anything?”
“Like what?”
Jim sighed as he tried to gather his thoughts. “Well …”
Kelsey smiled gently and squeezed his hand, “You two need to talk.”
Jim’s eyebrows shot up as a look of surprise settle over his face. “How …”
“It’s been coming for awhile, hasn’t it?” Kelsey waited for Jim’s nod. “You’re afraid to let go. He’s afraid he’ll hurt your feelings.”
"He's afraid of hurting my feelings?" Jim frowned a little at the thought. "He shouldn't be afraid of me."
Kelsey looked fondly at the big man sitting next to her. "Blair is definitely not afraid *of* you, Jim."
Jim cocked his head, as if processing this information. "You're not going to tell me any more, are you?"
"Nope. Give him some time to heal, but don't wait for him to say something first."
"But ..."
"Don't worry. Just be yourself ... you guys will work it out."
Kelsey's look of complete confidence made Jim smile almost shyly. "Yeah ... you're right. I'll see how his throat's doing in a few days."
"But don't stop him if he starts talking before that, okay?"
Jim chuckled and nodded, "Okay."
Kelsey grinned happily. "It's still early. Wanna watch another movie?"
"Sure ... but I get to pick this one," Jim stated as he grabbed up the cable guide.
<>~~<>~~<>
end