This story is in response to the CT New Year's Challenge and Marianne and Joni's Wacky Challenge. I have also added the "teletubbies" just for the sake of insanity. The following twenty-four items must be mentioned in the story.
New Year's Challenge items: toilet paper, Jim "owie", a New Year's resolution, red paint, miniature golf, dentures, boxer shorts, "Clue" game, crickets, and a letter.
Wacky Challenge items: the "Smurf" song, the missing Mars Probe, a butter knife, Scooby Doo boxers, dandruff shampoo, an unconscious chicken, blue tube socks, trick lottery cards, a purple Volkswagon Beetle, a moose, carrot seeds, Teletubbies, a navel ring, and lime green nail polish.
Disclaimer: Canon characters do not belong to me. They are the property of Pet Fly and Paramount. I don't make any money etc. etc. A big "thank you" to Becky for working her usual "magic."
Jim hurled the toy against the wall and dove for cover. Squeezing his eyes closed and covering his ears, Jim awaited the oncoming assault to his senses. The world around him exploded in a swirl of colors and sounds. A sudden, sharp pain smashed through his body. The colors faded as the sounds became a distant echo...
Blair opened his eyes slowly and mentally checked the "all-body-parts-present-and-accounted-for map." Shaking himself free of the fallen debris, he glanced around the room. Broken toys and displays littered the area -- Lego pieces, dismembered dolls, savagely torn books, countless playthings mercilessly strewn in a fit of sheer madness.
Carefully trying to maneuver through the mess, Blair's eyes fell upon a black leather jacket pinned under a huge mass of shelving. Darting towards the mass, Blair screamed, "Jim! Jim! Oh my god! Jim!"
Crouching beside Jim's unconscious form, Blair desperately tried to shift the shelving away from his body. Straining, Blair heaved himself against the structure. Unable to move the twisted heap of metal, Blair focused his attention on his partner.
Gently patting Jim's face, Blair whispered, "Jim. Wake up for me, man. Don't do this."
A slight groan passed from Jim's lips as he opened his eyes. "Chief?"
Shaking his head, Blair gazed into Jim's slit eyes. "It's okay, Jim. I'm gonna get you out of here. You stay with me. Do you understand?"
Heavy eyes blinked in response.
Rummaging through his pockets, Blair grabbed the cell phone and punched in the three-digit emergency code. After relaying the pertinent information, Blair stuffed the phone back in his jacket. Settling himself on his knees, Blair scanned Jim's body for injuries. 'Where does it hurt, Jim? Can you more your arms?"
A faint smile appeared on Jim's lips. "Right arm's okay. Can't feel much on the left. Head hurts. Hard to breathe."
"What about your legs?"
Taking a moment to compose himself, Jim whispered. "Okay. I can move them a bit."
Moving to the top of Jim's head, Blair wedged his hand under the shelving close to Jim's left arm.
"Ow! I think it's broken, Chief."
Pulling away, Blair stared at the blood dripping from his hand. "Oh man, you're bleeding too. You sure picked one hell of a night to go Christmas shopping, Jim. You're wedged in there so tight I could barely get a butter knife in there."
Repositioning himself beside Jim's head, Blair nodded. "You've got one nasty bump there, buddy. A nice gash too. How's the pain?"
Eyes drifting closed, Jim's breath came in short gasps.
Shaking him gently, Blair leaned closer to Jim's face. "Oh no. You're not gonna do this. You got to stay awake for me. Do you hear me?"
Grunting, Jim nodded. "Okay. How much longer?"
"The entrances are blocked. Whoever set these bombs knew exactly what they were doing. Thank god we got everybody out of here in time."
Shifting uneasily, Jim opened his eyes. "Except us. You got to get out of here. No telling how unstable this place is. Maybe there're more bombs."
"And leave you here? Not an option, Jim. I'm gonna look around for something to stop the bleeding. You keep those 'baby blues' on me, no 'cat' naps."
Following Blair with his eyes, Jim watched him rifle through the now demolished toy department. Holding up a box Blair grinned. "Look here, Jim. It's one of those old 'Clue' games. This should keep you entertained for a bit. You know, 'Miss Scarlet' with the 'gun' in the 'Library'?"
"More like a 'moose' in the 'bathroom' with the 'toilet paper'. I hate games, Sandburg."
Grinning, Blair picked up three boxes and balanced them in his arms. Returning to Jim's side, Blair began unpacking the boxes. "First we stop the bleeding, and then we have some fun. Jim?...You with me?"
"Yeah. Still here. What you got in mind?"
Waggling his eyebrows, Blair held up two remote control cars. "A race. Purple Volkswagon Beetle against a red Porsche."
"I get the Porsche."
Tearing open another package Blair produced a baby activity blanket "This should work. Sorry, Jim. There's no easy way to do this. Let's try turning down the 'dial'. Concentrate on my voice."
Working as gently as possible, Blair wedged the blanket against Jim's bleeding arm, securing it with a velcro strip. Feeling a wave of nausea waft through his body, Jim swallowed hard. "Chief. I don't feel so good."
"I know. It's gonna be okay. Let's try to take your mind off this thing."
After installing the batteries, Blair pressed a control into Jim's hand. Glancing around the room, Blair noticed a bottle of red model paint and some lime green nail polish in a corner not ten feet away. Retrieving the items, Blair proceeded to clear a path. Jim watched intently as Blair painted a thin line of green polish and another identical line of red paint at opposite ends of the room.
Lining up the cars on the green line, Blair smirked at the already smiling detective. "Okay, Ellison. Let's just see whose the 'king of the road' now."
Sitting cross legged beside his partner, Blair started the countdown. Within seconds, the two cars were easily gliding across the tiled floor. Blair fumbled for the ringing cell phone, just as the Porsche wiped out the Beetle, crashing it into a Barbie display. "That's cheating! I'll get you for that Ellison... Simon...Sorry... Yeah, Jim's still with us... Half an hour... He's bleeding pretty bad..."
Noticing that the Porsche had come to a slow stop, Blair stole a glance at his now unconscious partner. "Got to go, Simon."
Tossing the phone aside, Blair placed a hand on Jim's head. "Come on, Jim. Stay with me."
Sleepy blue eyes slitted open. "I won."
"I'll get you next time. So tell me something, Detective. Who'd you get for 'Secret Santa'?"
A tiny smile played on Jim's face. "It's supposed to be a secret. Privileged information."
"Come on. I got Simon. Wait till you see what I got him."
Rolling his eyes, Jim laughed. "I can only imagine. I got Rafe. Bought him some dandruff shampoo and some Scooby Doo boxers. That should impress the ladies. Nothing like 'boxers' to set the mood."
Giggling, Blair covered his mouth. "I got Simon some blue tube socks and a navel ring. I slipped one of those 'trick' lottery ticket card things in too. Can't wait to see him jumping up and down screaming 'I won. I won.'"
His body shuddering with suppressed laughter, Jim winced. "Ow! Ow! Don't do that, Chief. Man, that hurts."
"Sorry. Let's see. How else can I keep you entertained... I've got it!"
Disappearing for a moment, Blair returned with a box of crayons and a pad of paper. "Okay, Jim. New Year's resolutions time."
Eyebrows pinned, Blair scrawled something on the paper. "Done."
"What does it say?"
Tearing off the paper Blair folded it neatly and tucked it into Jim's pocket. "You can read it later. Your turn."
Moving the pad of paper closer to his partner, Blair turned his head away.
"No peeking, Sandburg. Just to make sure you don't cheat, I'm gonna mail this little letter to you."
After completing the note, Jim dropped the crayon and closed his eyes. Jostling him gently, Blair forced him to re-open his eyes. "We're almost there, partner. Just a little longer. What do you want to do for New Year's anyway? We've never even talked about it."
Tears swelling in his eyes, Jim mumbled, "Play miniature golf with some crickets. Search for the missing Mars probe. I don't care. I can't do this anymore."
"Yes, you can. I'm right here. Any minute now, Simon and his goons will be tearing this place apart. We'll get this thing off you, and we're home free."
Slowly nodding his head, Jim winced. "I could have grown carrots from seed by now. If they don't hurry up, they're gonna find an almost unconscious chicken screaming his head off."
Chuckling, Blair squeezed his hand. "If you don't keep those eyes open, I'll be forced to use drastic measures."
Raising his voice a few octaves, Blair began to sing the "Smurf Song" while making funny gestures with his hands. "La-la-la-la-la-la. Sing a happy song. La-la-la-la-la-la. Smurf the whole day long."
Jim tried to 'dial' down his hearing. "If you don't stop singing that damn song, you're gonna need dentures."
Simon's voice penetrated the silence. "Ellison! Sandburg! Where are you?"
Summoning all of his strength, Jim yelled. "Simon! Get me out of here. I've been kidnapped by a giant Teletubby!"
"Funny, Jim. Very funny."
"Ready to go Jim?" Blair smiled as he helped the detective into the wheelchair.
Glancing heavenward, Jim pleaded. "Get me out of here, Chief. I hate hospitals."
Draping Jim's coat over his shoulders, Blair headed for the door. "Oh...Wait a second, there's that cute nurse. I'll be right back."
Shaking his head, Jim winced as he reached in his coat pocket for his keys. A crumpled piece of paper fell on his lap. Unfolding the paper, Jim smiled at the simple crayon scrawled writing:
I resolve to never leave your side.
Smiling to himself, Jim folded the paper neatly and placed it back in his pocket. A similar letter had been placed in the mail early that morning.
I resolve to stop telling you to 'wait in the truck'.
Returning to the room, Blair patted Jim's uninjured arm. "Let's go home."
Reaching for Blair's hand, Jim met his eyes. "I'm with you partner. Every step of the way."